Go ahead...let loose!

How to Raise a Thinker

We consistantly tell our kids what to do and to some extend that's our job, right? Well, what if we're doing them a diservice by telling them too much and not asking them enough?  Here are some ways you can replace your statements with questions that will encourage them to develop problem solving skills at times.
                                                 
Instead of "Please make your bed!" ask "What should you be doing?"
Instead of "Don't talk to your sister that way!" ask "I'm not sure why you are talking to your sister that way?
Instead of "Tell that kid not to speak to you that way!" ask "What do you think is a good way to resolve this?"
Instead of "Share your toys!"  ask "Do you think Shelly likes it when your playing this way?"
Instead of "Always listen to your teacher!" ask "What do you think you could have done differently?"
Instead of "You need to get better grades!" ask "What can we do differently next time?  Lets make a plan."

               “Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”

― Epicurus

Why I Chose Therapy Over My Cable Bill

I am going through a very, very difficult time right now...extremely difficult. Probably one of the biggest challenges I will face in my life (I hope).  So, the question becomes...how do I cope? How do I make it through the long stressful, lonely days? How do I see the big picture and remember that this too shall pass (as EVERYONE tells me!)  How do I stay grounded and take good care of my kids while I'm hurting so badly?  How do I pay my bills, stay focused, find a career, and take care of myself at the same time.  Well, I decided therapy would be one of my current top priorities. 

I'm a firm believer that how you spend your money is a direct reflection of your priorities.  Right now my priorities are to get my S&^T together, stay healthy (or at least not let myself go), take good care of my kids, and get my finances back together.  SO, does watching the Bachelor or Good Morning America fit into my goals right now....um...I don't think so! 
So, it's been 1 month without cable and actually I don't really miss it!  I feel like I've been spending more quality time with my daughters and I am definitely more productive!  I get RedBox videos, videos from the library, and watch Modern Family and the Bachelorette on the internet occasionally but the funny thing is that I do not really miss it! When I babysit in the evenings at other families houses (with cable) I don't even turn on the t.v!

Well, I don't know what's happening in my life right now but one thing I do know is that I am being strong and my money is being used to make me stronger.

I don't pass any judgment on people who are using cable as their form of relaxation (because it can be a great thing to unwind and relax) but for me right now I feel better going to sleep at night knowing that I'm spending my money on things that will help me become a better person......and keep me off of suicide watch, drugs, or the streets...lol (kind of!)

If I Die Tomorrow-Letter to my Daughters

Dear Sienna and Jacklyn,
If I die tomorrow, I don't want you to feel sad. I want you to know that I lived a great life full of happiness, hard work, love, and many blessings. I truly believe that I lived my life to the fullest and I feel so lucky to have been blessed with a wonderful family and two beautiful little girls. I am so blessed to have known you and to be chosen to bring you into this world.
If you ever feel lonely, I want you to think of me as the moon. Just like the moon, even though you you can't always see me, I am still here in spirit. I am watching you from heaven-watching you make mistakes, watching you fall in love, watching you succeed, and most of all watching you enjoy your life. You are very young but I already know that God has given you many talents. IF you choose to use those tools, you will go far. You will be successful but it's up to you to define success.

Don't feel sad that I'm gone, feel happy that we got the opportunity to share so many special memories together.