Turning Regrets Into Lessons Learned

Our journey on this earth is a series of lessons and triumphs.  We make a lot of great decisions (and many bad ones) but all the choices that we have made have led us to be the empathetic, understanding people that we are today.  There is a story going around about a woman regretting that she stayed at home with her kids and didn’t continue working http://www.today.com/moms/stay-home-mom-i-regret-not-working-6C10388324#stay-home-mom-i-regret-not-working-6C10388324.  After I read the article I thought about all the moms out there that walk around with regrets.  Regrets about staying at home, regrets about working, regrets about staying in an unhealthy marriage, regrets about not being patient with their children…..and the list goes on and on and on.

What is the point of continuing to hold onto our regrets? If the reason is that you don’t want to do it again, why not change your ways and move on?  Regrets are burdens- they carry weight keeping you from moving on to bigger and better things.     

 Regrets are simply punishments that we place on ourselves.  But aren’t we already paying the price of the mistake we made by not having the outcome that we wanted?  Why punish ourselves with regret?  If you regret something you did to another person (like your children) then change your ways today.  Replace old behaviors with new ones and teach your children to live life to the fullest. 

Our life experiences make us who we are and our mistakes can actually be a good thing.  Mistakes are our “lessons learned” and make us grow and become better people.  The most successful people have made the biggest mistakes so I challenge you to embrace your journey that has made you the person you are and turn your regrets into ‘lessons learned’. 

4 Important Questions You Need to Ask Your Kids to Ensure a Drama Free Summer

It's only been a week into the summer vacation for some of my friends' kids and I'm already seeing posts on Facebook about how the parents don't know how they are going to survive these long dog days of summer with the kids.  Why not come up with some plans and ground rules now so that everyone is on the same page.  Here are some ideas to help you along.

1.  Ask your children what their plan is for the summer-don't except "I don't know" for an an answer....either they pick or you pick what things they will be doing.  I'm not saying they need to be entertained all summer but there are inexpensive camps and also many job opportunities that can keep kids busy (and out of trouble!)

2.  When your child comes to you with a complaint about their brother or sister (i.e." Jake just called me a mean name!") Instead of continuously stepping in to problem solve, try asking the child who comes to you if they asked their brother or sister WHY they said that and if they told them how it makes them feel.  We sometimes get in a habit of putting out fires when we could actually just start giving them tools to handle the process without involving you....and of course...that IS the ultimate goal......right!?

3.  Have a family conversation now about how much technology will be used this summer.  Involve your children in the decision.  You might be surprised to hear that they want to use devices less as well!

4.  Ask them what chores THEY would like to do while they are home for the summer!  The summer can be very long and if kids are not chipping in to do their part of housework it can make things very tough on parents.  Give them a list of things that need to be done and have them choose 10.

http://www.scarymommy.com/perspective/?utm_hp_ref=parents&ir=Parents

Chutes and Ladders

Life is like a game of Chutes and Ladders.  You're constantly working to go up and sometimes no matter how hard you try, you catch the chute that leads you right back to where you started.  When my husband and I decided to split, I found myself slipping down that long chute and as much as I tried to hang on to the sides and climb up the chute, God had other plans.  He needed me to get to the bottom and work myself up.  I felt like I had no control, powerless and useless.  I had to start doing my own finances, go through all the stuff that was left behind, figure out if I could afford to stay at home with my kids, and grieve.  But I didn't have time to grieve.  I had 2 little ones, ages 7 months and 4 years old.  How would I ever get through it?  I felt like my hopes and dreams were destroyed.  But things always get better and of course they have.

The answer is I just did it.  Just put one foot in front of the other and trusted in God.  Things have got better.  I have my budget figured out and custody is figured out. 
Whatever life struggle you're going through, remember that you're not alone.  Everyone has struggles at different points in their lives and you can still move up those ladders and of course enjoy the game along the way.  Although sometimes we can't help what number we get when we spin the wheel but we can choose weather we enjoy the game or become bitter because we can't get where we want... and also who we play the game with! 

Mommy Entourage: Despicable Me 2 Giveaway! In Theaters July 3rd!

Mommy Entourage: Despicable Me 2 Giveaway! In Theaters July 3rd!: Despicable Me was such a huge hit nationwide, we are thrilled to be able to offer advanced screening passes to see Despicable Me 2 before ...

10 Ways to Raise a Prince Charming

1.  Marry Prince Charming or spend time with good male role models.
2.  Pull the car over and share the appreciation of a beautiful sunset so he will also appreciate beauty.
3.  Don't worry about spilled milk, show more appreciation than frustration.
4.  When he makes mistakes, remind him how he's overcome mistakes before and ask him what he can do to better the situation.  Tell him you make mistakes often.
5.  Turn off your phone and spend quality time with the people that matter most...your prince.
6.  Catch him doing something nice and act like he just he just invented the light bulb....children pay attention when things are dramatized.
7.  Tell him you love him....every day....at least once every day!
8.  Give him words to articulate his feelings and ask him how he feels.
9.  Teach empathy and model patience. This balance can create empowerment and productivity.
10.  Finally, teach him that rescuing the princess is actually MEANS sharing life with an amazing person that loves and respects you.

Tough Mother....I Mean Tough Mudder!!

This weekend I survived the Tough Mudder....10 grueling miles of hills in Northeast, PA coupled with 13 crazy obstacles.  Aside from childbirth, this was the hardest thing I have EVER done (including my black belt test....shhhhh...don't tell me sensei)  But this was really the coolest thing I have ever done!
I originally signed up for this race so that I would have something to train for (and make me commit to working out) before bathing suit season rolls around. And honestly, as a single girl, the thought of thousands of strong, muscular men covered in mud climbing walls and ducking under barb wire was a perk ;)....But I didn't expect it to be so fun. I asked my Mom to take care of my girls for the day (and honestly she had a tougher day than me!) and I got in the car heading for the hills of Schnecksville, PA. 

This is me in the car ride heading to the Mudder!

My adrenaline was racing from the moment I got there and when the announcer gave us an amazing
motivational speech about never giving up and doing this for our wounded veterans, I knew that I was hooked into this "Tough Mudder thing".

 

One of the toughest obstacles of the day...
Mt. Everest

 

Who says mommy's can't have fun???

Yes, that's me jumping in the air!!

 

CROSSING THE FINISHING LINE

By the time I finished, I had made new friends and definitely a new perspective that didn't just stay on that beautiful mountain in Schnecksville, PA.  I began teaching my daughter about never giving up.  I told her the story about how scared I was when I was getting ready for the race but I didn't give up.  I taught her that mommy's can be strong, brave and do things for other people who need help ( she's only 4 so I didn't explain the whole veteran thing). 

The next day I went out with my girlfriend for dinner.  I was covered in bruises...but still had a bit of a Tough Mudder body!  I'm pretty sure I'm a mudder for life.   

The Best Things in Life Are Free..

 

 

Girlfriends

Enjoying the countryside...

 

The best things in life are free....

"A child who always forgets has a parent who always remembers." -Amy McCready, Positive Parenting Solutions